Hi!

My name is Santiago. I've been married for 6 years and I've had a kid for 3. I'm Latino, and a graduate in political science and administration.

I've decided to write this blog because I'd like to explore a science that is as inexact as almost any other human interaction, marriage.

We've all heard the usual advice, communication, understanding, compromise... It is not easy being in a relationship, much less in a marriage, and the reason I think that is, is well because we have no idea why it's got to be difficult. We don't understand love and that's why when we've found it, we have no idea what to do with it.

Think of it this way... it's like hopping on a manual car having driven an automatic all your life. As similar as it is it's not the same. Being married is not the same as being boyfriend and girlfriend, even if you have been living together (which by the way should be a must before tying the knot).

When you are boyfriend and girlfriend you are commited to yourself and since it makes you happy to do things for your girl you do them. If it doesn't work out, you can always opt out. Marriage is different, and you know it from the moment you get engaged, It's not about me anymore, it's about us.

Most people don't realize this before they get engaged which is why most couples end up fighting before the wedding and some don't even make it there. It's hard giving up things for another person's happiness and it's difficult balancing who has to compromise more.

And the wedding is only the beginning of the rest of your life. Marriage is about finding a balance for everything. A balance doesn't always mean the same proportion, most of the time it'll mean a proportion that works for both people. Often many small actions equate to one big action done by your significant other.

Have you found balance in your married life? Are the proportions right for both of you?